thugxwife:

Tumbling from the bath.

thewonderlessyears:

yes i did just edit Slenderman into this picture and no i don’t have a life

nue:

i hate teachers who give homework over break like do u not understand what a break is do u want me to demonstrate on ur neck

slvmb3r:

i fucking love brown eyes omg

nephyria:

me on my way to steal yo pokemon

phriend:

fun prank: replace sugar packets at restaurants with cocaine

mianaya:

grubbsgrady:

therealhamster:

2004 was 17 years ago

2004 was only 9 years ago 

math

catswithbenefits:

im not saying im jesus but i can turn water into kool aid 

50% of me wants to be the type of girl who does yoga at night, and drinks green tea, and reads books, and wears cute pyjamas, and stays at home; while the other 50% of me wants to wear my sexiest outfit and go out doing lines of cocaine off strippers racks while dancing to dirty music until I black out. 

ibock:

done^done

done to the doneth power

josheeta:

oh and i was in barnes and nobles today and my sister picked up 50 shades of grey and was like in all seriousness what is the book about and i said tori it is an erotic novel and middle aged women who can’t get laid masturbate to it and this man behind me started laughing so hard he walked into a book shelf 

therealhamster:

afuckinglesbian:

If anyone wants to buy a pet octopus click here.

• DO NOT BUY A PET OCTOPUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• DO NOT BUY A PET OCTOPUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• DO NOT BUY A PET OCTOPUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
• DO NOT BUY A PET OCTOPUS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

grrrlfever:

my life became 600% better when i started acting like a self obsessed piece of shit like 10/10 would recommend

even if u don’t actually genuinely love yourself its fuckin fun to act like you think you’re the human embodiment of perfection go on try it life’s too short to not fall in love with yourself

1chainz:

*mom comes in room* *immediately switches tab to picture of banana*